The One with the Wet Knickers, the Land That Time Forgot, and Breathtaking Views
- 📍 Location: Lulworth Cove & Tyneham Village Loop
- 🥾 Miles: 11 miles
- 🌨️ Weather: A mix of mist, drenching rain, hail, and glorious sunshine—truly all seasons in one day!
HIGHLIGHTS:
9:20 am – Poncho on, I’m ready to go! 🦸♀️ Nearly had a heart attack when I saw parking at Lulworth Cove has jumped from £8 to £20 since last year. 😱
9:58 am – We hit the first incline. The mist is so thick it feels like walking through a cloud that’s soaking us to the bone. 🌫️ Thankfully, I’m armed with a rain jacket, poncho, waterproof socks, and an umbrella. ☔
10:16 am – I’m boiling! 🥵 Why did I think a poncho over a rain jacket was a good idea? I strip down to just an AG T-shirt and my waterproof jacket, pit-zips open, and I’m ready to roll. 🧥
10:30 am – Warning signs alert us to the Military Firing Range: “Do not touch any military debris; it may explode and kill you.” ⚠️ We all stick to the path. 🚶♂️🚶♀️
10:34 am – Rob spots a herd of deer trotting towards the woods—a magical sight. 🦌✨
11:23 am – Our first big incline. I have to catch my breath a few times, but it’s good to feel challenged. 💪 It’s been a while since I felt this way on a hike.
12:10 pm – We start a technical decline, slippery and muddy. Annette suddenly slips and ends up sitting in the mud, cutting her hand. 🩹 She’s okay, though—it’s her pride that’s hurt more than anything. 😅
12:14 pm – More drama! Annette’s on the ground again. I tell her to stay put because, as per the rules, you don’t get up until a photo’s been taken. 📸 Snap!
12:38 pm – We reach the bottom of the decline and see a guy sliding down the entire trail on his bum. His rear end must be filthy! 😆
12:43 pm – We stop at the Cove with its gorgeous sandy beach 🏖️ for a group photo. The sun is shining, so off come the layers again. 🌞 The wind, rain, and sunshine seem to be in some kind of contest today.
1:49 pm – Have you ever visited Tyneham? 🕰️ We stop for lunch 🍴 and explore this eerie, nostalgic lost village, frozen in time since it was taken over by the military during the war. The little schoolhouse reminds me of “Little House on the Prairie,” if you can remember that far back. 🏫
2:45 pm – The hike resumes under glorious sunshine, but there’s a huge dark cloud ahead. 🌤️ Within 10 minutes, and during another gruelling climb, the heavens open. 🌧️ We’re pelted with what feels like giant hailstones (but it’s probably just heavy rain). Our dry clothes are soaked again—my waterproof socks are even breached. 😩
3:25 pm – We’re back on the coastal path, navigating more ups, downs, “beware of live ammunition” signs, and the occasional army tank. 🪖 It’s a beautiful trail with plenty to see. 👀
4:01 pm – We gather at the top of a steep climb. “Is that a trig point?” someone asks, pointing at a triangle of stones. 🧐 Rob corrects, “No, it’s a war memorial.” 🏅 We take another group photo, pause to take in the views, and hydrate before continuing. 💦
With the hard work done, we slowly return to Lulworth Cove car park. It’s time for a well-deserved ice cream 🍦 and Cornish pasty or coffee. ☕ We watch swimmers in the sea as the sun beats down on us—there’s not a cloud in the sky. It’s hard to believe that just a few hours ago, we were battling horizontal rain! 🌊☀️
What a fantastic walk. A big thanks to Lou Stuart for leading the trail today and to Martin for being our support vehicle. 🙏